friendships

my husband is my best friend. i know this not just because he is my husband, but because he has to live with a crazy woman and he still wants to be my friend. i have failed him so many times and he has forgiven me - that is GOD's grace right there. i am a pessimist and worrier by nature. i can find the negative in almost any situation and i usually do. the main reason for that is i have very low self-esteem. this can be quite draining on any of my friends. i am a doom and gloom kind of person. most of the books or articles i read reflect this. the more depressive it is the more i seem to gravitate towards it.

i am in awe of most of my friends. each one is so unique and that is how GOD made them. i have friends that are so great in their walk with CHRIST that they make me want to strive to be a better person. i have friends that are so giving that i wish i had just an ounce of that in my pinky finger. over the years friendships have come and gone. some i let go, because it was bad for me and them. we made mistakes of our youth that some how we thought at the time was important. i can only hope that we both have grown enough with wisdom that we realize that we are sinful by nature and we fail each other. i trusted in some friendships that weren't really friendships at all.

when i was first diagnosed with MS i was only 26. this is young, so i was still in that 20's phase where you went out and did stupid things, but i was going to have to change. it took me long time to do that. those friends remember that stage and i think that it is still sometimes hard for them to see that i have changed. i have friends that came to me after the diagnosis and that is the only way they have seen me. most of these friends have been with me on my journey with CHRIST and they are the most spiritually-gifted people i know. these are true christians in every definition. i love that about them. they make my life easier. all my friends do. i have been blessed by beautiful individuals in my life - GOD made sure of that, only him. these friends can rebuke me when i am wrong, and they do. that is ok they are supposed to do that, GOD instructs them to.

a pray that my friends know that i cherish and love them. that i would be there for them in a heartbeat. that i am so very grateful for their support and love that they show to me and my family. i have cried many tears of joy over them over the years. i love you dear friends - thank you.

"a man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." proverbs 18:24