christian rebuking is something that you will have to face in your journey with GOD. if you aren't backing it with scripture and you are just plain, outright being judgemental and selfish. then you are being mean and hurtful. this one is a hard one, because individuals will see it as an attack sometimes, or they will learn from it. i have said this before that scripture is offensive, and we must own our words and actions. if you are speaking about the christian life, but aren't living that life then you are open for rebuking when you ask for guidance, or a trusted individual in life gives you that.
when hurtful things happen to us we usually can only see our side. we don't take the time to put ourselves in another's shoes. i have been called bitter, angry and unhappy with my life. i'm not unhappy with my life, i'm unhappy with situations in my life. there is difference. for most of us we aren't unhappy with the way our life is going, we're just upset by the circumstances that have unfolded around us. it's all apart of the cycles that we go through. their will be months in your life where nothing tests you, and then bam out of no where a test or trial comes our way.
i go to a few friends, or pastors more for guidance then i do my parents now. it's not that i don't trust my parents judgement it's just if it is something about my marriage they don't need to know. they will only see my side and that is a dishonor to my husband. the other problem of course is whether i say something or not to them they know when i am hurting.
paul was a master at rebuking. i don't mean that in a bad way. he just knew what others were to be doing because GOD had told him what they should be doing. i have had to humbly admit when i was wrong in a situation and try to learn from that. when i was in my teens and twenties i would say whatever even more than i do now. which is amazing if you think about it for those of you that know me. my husband has had to make sure i hold my tongue. i am quite grateful that he has done this over the years. i still can put my foot in my mouth, but he has saved me numerous times from causing damage.
a situation occurred a little over a month ago where i put my foot in my mouth and said aloud my judgements about another. i judged everything about this individual and the choices they had made, because i was deeply hurt by them. it's not my life; i had no right do that. i turned my hurt and anger around onto this individual and attacked them verbally. i was rebuked by my husband and he made me see what i had done. i apologized because i knew i was wrong about what i had done. this should have been the end of it.
i have thought about how to handle this and sought guidance from much wiser individuals and scripture. the written words that followed were not true about by my character and they were done to hurt me intentionally. i had caused this person great pain in this situation, but this person also caused me great pain. we were both wrong. i forgive this person because GOD has told me to. i confessed my sin to HIM and to others, now i'm doing it here. if i am to live a christian life then i must learn to forgive.
what we do on this earth and the choices we make will affect our journey to eternal life in heaven. that is not a lie. if we are not seeking guidance from scripture or seeking repentance for our sins, we may not make it to heaven. GOD does not give wiggle room. we all must take accountability and humility for our words and actions.
"We usually think of a rebuke as a bad thing, but when it's used in love to put somebody on the correct path, it can be a blessing to them." 2 timothy 4:2
"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom." proverbs 11:2
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