Wednesday, October 5, 2011

maturity, the church and friendships

I have been reading about Paul and his friendships during his journey. We know that he had great love for Timothy who Paul entrusted to carry on his mission. We also know that some along the way fled out of fear, and became lovers of the world. I don’t begrudge them for that because it is very hard to put God and his laws above society. Especially in the world we live in today.
Two misconceptions in society about being a “Christian” that says if we don’t constantly give, or if we are choosing to live a Christian life we are judgmental. Society’s definition is not god’s definition. The church is not the definition of being a follower of Christ. They are all different in how they worship him, and they feel that is how God intended for them to worship. The Catholic Church believes it is the only true church of God, and protestant churches feel the same way. We have become so blinded by the traditions and rules of the church that we replace God.

What are our motives in how we view society? Is it from scripture, or from the church? Are we lumping together a group of individuals instead of looking at the individual? Are we judging the individual on appearance, or by the actions? Are we looking at their deeds more than their faith, or faith without deeds? I know “Christians” that do really stupid things, and I know “non-Christians” that do great things. Just because they don’t attend does not mean they are not followers of Christ. We have to be careful when we make that assumption.

When I was diagnosed with MS my old life no longer existed. I had to give it up. The road ahead was not something that I had chosen for myself. It was a burden that I did not want. I did not want to give up “the good time” of being in my twenties. I like to forget that I have MS. I like to think that it is not there. When I told people that I was sick I wanted sympathy for being sick, and I wanted to be taken care of by my family and friends. This was stupid and immature. I decided to go the opposite route and pretend it wasn’t there. I didn’t want people to see the physical and emotional side of it. That is being too vulnerable, and I have a lot of pride. I would end being disappointed when I expected too much from someone else. This was my issue not someone else’s.

There are 6 women that have seen me when I am extremely sick. My husband, my parents, and my in-laws have seen me this way. My children do not yet understand. These women are the ones that I go to for advice, for laughs, for crying, etc. I am very guarded with who sees me during this time. I am too vulnerable at that time, and I’m not comfortable showing that side of myself.

One of these women I met through my husband. When I was first diagnosed we had kind of a falling out, but it was more of a misunderstanding. We wasted a lot of time when all we should have done was talk it out. It was nothing that she did it was me expecting something that she didn’t know I needed.

The last couple of months have been very weird for us. We left our church, but we finally have peace about it. It is the first time in years that I have not felt guilty about missing a Sunday, or saying no. I made some really bad choices awhile ago and I have had to own up to it. He forced me to see it for what it was. We heard sermon on Sunday about not letting religion become the authority in our lives. We had done that. In the process we relied on our church to fill the void that God should be filling. We forget that the church is run by men. That is why it is not perfect.
My choices were pushing me away from these women. This was wrong. The beautiful part about this is these women let me go through this knowing what I was doing was not right. They didn’t judge me, they didn’t push me to stop, and they didn’t stop being my friend. They love me unconditionally without fear or judgment - that is love. They understand that we go through trials that each of has to deal with. If you have individuals like this in your life cherish them. This is God’s definition of friendship. Friends can handle the good and bad times. We are willing to work it out no matter how hard it is to confront.

This is growing with Him. This is maturity. This is being able to constantly discern and seek wisdom.We either fail at it, or succeed. That is our choice. We can either stay calm and push through it, or ignore it. I don’t know what the answers are. Below is my favorite parable in the bible, or story. The reason why is because this is how I believe we should see individuals; no one is perfect The sin committed can be replaced with every sin that Christ tells us about. Not one person in our lives can say they are without sin. Even our thoughts can be sin. Recognize it for what is.

“but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them. The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.” (John 8:1-11 ESV)

No comments:

Post a Comment