the ultimate goal

heaven is the ultimate goal. what we do on earth is going to determine our outcome for eternal life. normally i would be freaked out completely by this, and would be stressing over this now. this is the year though that i have challenged myself to completely let go and let GOD'S rules take over.

our pastor said something yesterday that was a burden lifted that i didn't even realize i had. i have been begging for years to have some of my emotional pain be removed and it's never gone away. what if GOD has intended for me to have it, so i will continue to rely on HIM? our pastor stood before the congregation and with great humility confessed the terrible pain that he had been going through in his marriage which ultimately ended in divorce.

what i took away from that sermon was that there are some things in life that will never go away; the pain of it. i still have pain over my parents divorce. i've been praying for it to be taken away, and most of it has actually been taken away. i have forgiven those that i know caused this pain; i love them dearly. this emotional heartache is actually a huge driving force in my life that encourages me to strive. this actual pain is what makes me continue to make my marriage stronger.

my husband and i have a joke that when we got married we were "blinded" by the love. for those of you that are married you remember the euphoric, romantic love that blinded all sense of reality to what marriage was really going to be like that is what "blinded by the love means." the month before we were married was hell, actually the whole time planning the wedding was not much fun. the end result was beautiful; i loved my wedding.

if there is any advice that i could give someone getting married is that you must be willing to continually sacrifice for one another, or you're not going to make it. there are some things that i know you can't sacrifice and that will always be a challenge. when you're young and getting married remember this. the marriages that have lasted over 20, 30, 40 years i'm sure know this already. the other is to remember that you will change over time, sometimes for the better and sometimes not.

our marriage is preparing us over the course our lifetime to be graced by HIM. what we choose to do in our marriage is a reflection on HIM. your relationship with CHRIST is the same. GOD tells you what is right and what is wrong. GOD tells you what is acceptable and what isn't. GOD tells you what is offensive and what isn't. GOD is continually teaching us to learn from HIS word; not just ourselves, but from each other.

i remember an argument that i had with my father years ago. i was a teenager and in my selfish and prideful ego i asked my father to choose me over my step-mother; to put me first. he said no. i remember that i was so angry and hurt by this, but i get it now. i can imagine how destroying that would have been to their marriage. in that one moment my father showed me one of the greatest lessons about love and marriage.

a friend yesterday that i've known for years said "10 years ago if you had told me that you would become religious i wouldn't have believed it." my response was that i got sick, but i have reconsidered that answer. i got sick and got married. two of the greatest blessings that i have ever been given by GOD.

"15 The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. 16 For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him. 17 He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. 18 And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. 19 For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, 20 and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross." colossians 1:15-20