My grandmother passed away over a year ago. I have been studying her life in my mind and who she was. 3 things really stick out my mind regarding her mindset and beliefs; god, her role, and money. A few of her comments really stick out in mind in conversations we had about life; “women decided to be men, and women are not men, your husband comes first and the banks can fail again.” I am grateful that by the time she left us to go home with him her mind wasn’t aware of the complete changes in this country. She was so disturbed by Hilary Clinton running for president of this country.
She was the definition of Proverbs 31 and that is hard legacy to find in this day and age. The Old Testament view of women was very different from the new, but the roles were defined and the same. Men were to work outside of the home to provide financially and women were to care for the home. The role of women has never changed in scripture only in the world. I was having an issue with exactly what I should and shouldn’t be doing regarding church during bible studies. Scripture is very black and white on the roles and the corruption of the church leadership if women are in those roles.
Women are to teach to women only. Men are to be pastors and elders of the church. Very defining roles and I don’t really know why women have changed so radically coming from depression era parents. This is a pretty simple command, and so many protestant churches as well as catholic studies allow women to teach in leadership roles; women pastors, bible studies, and boards. False doctrine. Eve was the cause of the fall not Adam.
Both of my grandmothers had huge impact on my life. Both were very strong women and polar opposites in personality. Extreme hardships in very different lives. My mother’s mother lost her husband very early and had a child to support, but she was still the proverbs 31 woman. Women should only be working to feed their children. That is the definition of being a mother; you work to feed your child and not for self-gratification. Men are to provide for their wives and children, and women are to make sure a husband’s home runs efficiently. Christ loved women, but the idea that he would have allowed women to have such major roles in the world is confusing to me. He knew that Eve was the reason for the fall and he knew what a woman’s role was, so I am trying to figure out where Christian women got the idea that they were to be spiritual leaders, and have careers outside of the home.
This has been prayer for the past year and my new conviction to my husband. I want him to be the leader in our home. I want him to make more decisions regarding how we are to live. That is hard thing being raised by a feminist mother, and society’s view of what a woman should be. It is never out of my mind that I am woman and women cause men to fall in God’s eyes. The parallel to this is that women will be held accountable if they take control over a man. We have a pagan society where women are worshipped for their success in their careers and advances. My question is how do husbands and children fit into this? Men have lost their masculinity to the point by women that they have no idea any longer about their roles.
This was actually was one of the biggest problems in our marriage. Trying to figure out our roles. It took almost 9 years to overcome. We were blessed to have been told by a man that we respect dearly to tell us exactly what we were doing wrong and what needed to be done in December of 2010. We are returning to a honeymoon stage and it is awesome. Don’t get me wrong we have our moments, but we are very aware of what we need from each other. We both have a tendency to rebel with each other when we don’t keep the Ephesians 5 definition of marriage.
Over the past month I have heard the term “militant” over and over again about being a follower of Christ. Once from our pastor’s wife during an evening of fellowship with other women. We have to be militant and firm when it comes to God’s commands in all things. When I give my husband more control over our lives his needs are respected and met. When I try to take control of that we do not do well. That is God. We have a very deep, loving marriage because of this now. I am so grateful to a woman that gave me the advice of what a biblical marriage is supposed to be. My husband is so grateful to a man that told him what his role was as a husband.
The breakdown of families in this country is one of the main reasons we will fall. Women since the 1960’s have decided they could rule the world better than men. They have decided that they are men. Women choose their advances in careers over their husbands and children. Somewhere a long the line women thought they were doormats, and I don’t get it. The women I know that live their lives this way are anything but doormats, and are deeply cherished and loved by their husbands. There isn’t a lot of resentment or bitterness in their husbands.
My husband and I wrote love letters to each other for Christmas. It made the life we are living worthy to each other. My heart is greatly fulfilled because I allowed God to come first, and let my husband be a man. It really isn’t that hard and I have no idea why I waited this long to do this. It would have been a hell of a lot easier to have listened to my grandmother before I got married. The funny part this is that when I finally allowed him to take the reins he was much different about our marriage and my heart.
Our bible study teacher asked if my husband felt overshadowed by me because of my speaking in class or that I ask questions. He said no, because I get up and study and he doesn’t do that. The funny part is in my mind it has always been the opposite; he has overshadowed me.
When he asked my father for my hand in marriage my dad had two firm requests from him. One that he would always have a job, three if he needed to, and that he would protect my heart no matter what. My father has only held him accountable once to this. Women have great power in their homes to either to destroy it and make it a home. One of my greatest fears is that my sons will marry a woman that does not understand this definition. My boys are witnessing a father that has deep love and respect for their mother, and vice versa. We have to train them everyday to leave us and care for their own families.
http://www.gty.org/resources/Articles/A168/Gods-High-Call-for-Women
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