The fear of sexual abuse is a nightmare for parents. I am having a hard time wrapping my mind around all of this and why someone would protect a man for all these years because of football. It keeps getting worse by the minute and now there is a rumor that Sandusky may have been prostituting children out to the highest donors through the charity that he founded, Second Mile. Enabling someone to hurt a child is the same as the act itself. God was very clear about protecting innocent life; children. We have no excuse if we say we believe in God and don‘t do anything; welcome to hell. That why’s abortion is genocide.
Being raised by a social worker that’s sole job was to protect physically and sexually abused children leaves an impression. The stories I have heard are horrific. Writing about this is not an easy thing, but if you think this is going on or know that it is you need to do something. We will be as guilty as the pedophile in the eyes of God and in my opinion we should be in the justice system. My mother in all of years of training can spot someone, or can have a sense that something is not right just by looking. I thank God she is in my children‘s life everyday.
There is no excuse for not protecting a child; none. I don’t care if you are a great coach or not. The students that are protesting his firing have turned the priority into football and not those children. The damage that has been done is irreversible. We are turning perversion into rights in this country. Sometime ago I wrote a posting regarding psychiatrists that are doing studies that are suggesting this is a lifestyle and should be accepted just like homosexuality. There is even a bill out there to put this in our laws through individuals that are protecting pedophiles. If we stand by and let it happen we have failed as a nation.
We argue that rich people have too much money. We argue about Medicare. We are arguing about immigration. We argue about education. We argue about how expensive our healthcare is. We worry about social security and the seniors in our country well get off your ass and take care of your parents. They clothed you, feed you, and gave you shelter. Quit relying on the government to do it for you.
We don’t argue about the resources in this country that have been cut federally and through the states to protect children. Second Mile is an organization for high-risk foster care children. My only question is; what the hell is wrong with us? If we keep cutting the very programs that protect our children we will be damned, and I think he is already doing that. We worry more about the parents and their welfare. By cutting the very things that protect our citizens out of compassion and empathy for the poor in this country we are failing. If you want to help the poor get off your ass and do it.
Unfortunately this story reminds of the Catholic Church. That is the reason why I would never be a supporter of the Catholic Church. The pope and the higher authorities in the church protected the priests that are pedophiles and destroyed thousands of lives because of that. Do people not realize that their authority is not the church, but God is? The parishnors that allow that to continue are just as much to blame in my opinion. We are commanded by God to protect innocent life, and those that ignore that will be held accountable. In our minds we don’t think that he will. He keeps a list of everything we do.
Over the last few months my opinions and beliefs regarding politics has changed even more. I don’t care about all of this stuff. I want the money to go to our protection. I want to know that my children are safe and that our law enforcement has the resources to do that. We are putting money above God and our children. We should be damned. I hope that this posting makes us feel terrible about what we are doing and question our beliefs in this country. I even hope that if this offends one of you so you can get out of my life. I have no tolerance for people that cannot see what they are doing to the children in this nation.
Our fear of reporting, or going after someone that does this is insane to me. We think I can’t get myself involved in this. What is wrong with us? We have got a bunch of spoiled individuals out there protesting because Wall Street makes money and they want it. Life sucks and it is hard. Suck it up. I don’t care about collective bargaining rights, or that we have college debts. I don’t care if we got in over our heads financially, and everyone else wants someone to pay for it. No one told us that everything in life is secure. I could lose every thing tomorrow. If your parents taught you that than I feel bad for you, because you will be in for a very rude awakening. If you have child and are relying on someone else to take care of them for you, you should be ashamed.
I am a republican and conservative because their beliefs are more towards protecting our country with the military and law enforcement. They don’t believe in those cuts. I want our troops home. I don’t care if the Middle East kills themselves off. I don’t care about the oil over there, because we have oil here. We won’t drill because of animals and trees. What about protecting our children? My liberal friends get your priorities straight. There is no excuse for not protecting our citizens on our soil. I am not going to apologize if you don’t feel that is not compassionate. We better protect our defense and our 2nd amendment right to bear arms. Don’t jeopardize their resources because you don’t think people want to harm you or your children.
There is no compromise on this; none. If you say you are a Christian then you should probably read the bible more because you are not one. This should disgust you, and I will question your heart on this and you accountable. When you had your child he gave you that child to protect, love and raise. We may have physically had the child, but they are his. I don’t understand this country. I don’t understand democrats and liberals because with their misguided bullshit our children are being raped, killed and neglected. We want everyone else to take care of them. We want to protect the very individuals that do this over our children, because they may get hurt in prison. Even criminals in prisons can’t stand individuals that hurt children.
Every president and congressman that has allowed these cuts to happen is an enabler. They don’t deserve to serve this country. I am very passionate about children, because I have met a lot of the children that this happened to. I have no idea how my mother did not kill some of these people. I would have hung them from the tree on the courthouse steps. I would give my life for my children. They are God’s children, and every child in the United States is his. I would start fighting for protection, and then we can move forward.
I started thinking about why I really want a new house. I realized that for over 2 years I have wanted another child. I want one desperately. I can’t physically have one, but I can take a child into our home. People always say how are you going to do that with your MS? God has protected me for a very long time regarding my MS. My MS does not matter when it comes to my children. If I have fear about my illness I have failed him.
I am not going to apologize to anyone about this post. Don’t even email me if this offends you. There are two sides and if we forget his wrath for ignoring what is right shame on us. Scripture justifies war and capital punishment. Stop trying to change his word. You have failed him when you do that. He is very clear that by his hand alone you may, or may not get it.
“Cursed be anyone who takes a bribe to shed innocent blood.’ And all the people shall say, ‘Amen.’ Deuteronomy 27:25
“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for
him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea.” 9:42
“But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the detestable, as for murderers, the sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars, their portion will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.” Revelations 21:8
Friday, November 11, 2011
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
My Mom and I
The first biggest fear for me buying a new house is my boys and the adjustment. The second biggest fear is money. I failed right there and I continue to fail every time I don’t trust in him. Fear, worry, and anxiety are terrible. I have to remember that in the long run this will be good for my boys, and I will be caring for my mom. She doesn't need it yet, but I have a responsibility to her as her daughter. The funny part is it took me a long time to be ok about living with her. I haven't lived with her since I was 13 years old.
If you had asked me 10 years, or even 5 years ago if I would move in with my mom I would have said no way is that going to happen. We have come full circle. Being the daughter of a social worker is not easy. When we are children we are selfish. We don’t understand the bigger picture that there are people out there that need help. We just want our mom. It is taken me years to overcome my parents divorce. They made mistakes because they are human. Now that I am married I can understand why people divorce and the damage they can cause to each other. In the end it would not have been have choice for me not to deal with it, because I adore and cherish them.
My husband said something to me one day, and it all made sense to me right then regarding my relationship with my mom. When it comes to our children their needs come first. For years I had felt that my mom chose the needs of others above my brother and I. When my parents divorced my mom went back to work because she had to. She made the decision not to take alimony from dad. She didn’t feel that was right, but with that choice she would have to be away from us. My dad had a lot of financial responsibility, so he decided to move to Texas to take a higher paying position. That was his choice. I resented him for moving to Texas.
I am going to tell you though I thank God they made these choices because I would not be the person I am today if was not for my parents. I would not have the strength to live my life the way I do. Both are “tell like it is” individuals. They did not sugar coat life for either one of us. They allowed us to make mistakes. There is no way they did not know what the consequence would be if we did something. I would get myself in trouble and well they would say “sorry you made that decision that is being an adult.” When I got married they said marriage is hard and a lot of work. This is your decision and we’ve raised you. When I had my first child they said; we will help when you need it but we are not babysitters, and remember you wanted a child.
When I was 13 I made the decision to move in with my dad. I left my mom and my brother. The guilt is still there. I adore my brother and I am very proud of the man that he has become. I was not a kind child. Very angry and depressed. I was angry with my mom and my dad. I needed them both very much. The twist on this is when I moved to Texas I rebelled big time against my dad’s authority. Plus, I was a teenage girl that thought she knew everything. Silly, silly teenagers listen to your parents because you don’t know anything yet.
The greatest blessing God ever gave me is my MS. Yes, he gave me my husband and my children but my MS is the greatest gift he has ever given me. I had ignored him for so long, and had so much pain in my heart that he forced me to deal with it. While dealing with the diagnosis in therapy all the other stuff came out. I felt abandoned and unloved my mother, because she had given so much to other children that really needed it. I needed my mom too. I think about that now and I can’t imagine the emotional toll it took on my mom to do her job. I don’t know how she had anything left by the end of the day knowing what she knew parents were capable of doing to their children.
Almost 8 years ago my mother retired early and moved to Chicago to take care of my uncle. During that time my husband and I decided that we wanted a child. I knew that physically this was going to take a lot work. I was going to need help with the baby when I needed to rest. I asked my mom to move to Texas to help me. To be honest I thought she would say no. I thought she has taken care of my uncle and she wants to get back to her friends and her life. When she said yes my heart began to heal. I couldn’t believe that she had chosen me. I needed that. She gave up her life to be with me. I am so grateful for that.
God gave us both that gift. We had to forgive each other for what we had done to each other. Our relationship is really good now. I envy my sons relationship with her. They get to have that part of her that I really never had. I get to have it now, and it feels wonderful to have my mom. We don’t agree politically, but we do on how we give in most things. I got that from her. I just need her to be here with us. I want her to have this life with us, and know that we will take care of her if she needs it.
My parents are proud of their children and I think they know they did something right. It is amazing how God works in your life when you let him. When I told them I was sick I think it began to change for them. They both reacted in different ways. I was a month a way from getting married, and that was a concern for both of them. They knew this was going to be hard on me and my husband. My dad asked him flat out if he was still going to marry me. I have a good husband. My parents respect him a great deal, because not many men could handle that with such grace.
They both have only gotten mad at him once over the years. To be honest I am surprised neither one of them got involved in the situation. My parents don’t do that. I have never seen them that mad before because they felt he was not protecting my heart and I got very sick. I have also never seen them come together again as my parents protecting their daughter. They actually discussed it at an MS dinner where I was speaking.
They have always stayed out of our choices on how we are living now that we are adults. Well, I should say they give me looks when I can tell they don’t agree with something. I can count on one hand how many times they have said something to me. It is not always in my favor. They do not pretend their daughter is perfect when I have asked for advice (which is very rare). Thank God because it keeps me in check.
They are enjoying their life now with my children. They are proud of my boys’ hearts, and the mom I am to them. That is great feeling. When I talk about my parents I really need to include my step mom because she had to deal with a lot when I was living in her home. I have apologized to her for my actions. My boys adore her, and my step mom is an incredible woman, wife, and mother. She is just as protective of my brother and me as my parents are. I never realized that until the end of last of year. I am honoring my parents by being the adult that they raised to be.
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you." Exodus 20:12
If you had asked me 10 years, or even 5 years ago if I would move in with my mom I would have said no way is that going to happen. We have come full circle. Being the daughter of a social worker is not easy. When we are children we are selfish. We don’t understand the bigger picture that there are people out there that need help. We just want our mom. It is taken me years to overcome my parents divorce. They made mistakes because they are human. Now that I am married I can understand why people divorce and the damage they can cause to each other. In the end it would not have been have choice for me not to deal with it, because I adore and cherish them.
My husband said something to me one day, and it all made sense to me right then regarding my relationship with my mom. When it comes to our children their needs come first. For years I had felt that my mom chose the needs of others above my brother and I. When my parents divorced my mom went back to work because she had to. She made the decision not to take alimony from dad. She didn’t feel that was right, but with that choice she would have to be away from us. My dad had a lot of financial responsibility, so he decided to move to Texas to take a higher paying position. That was his choice. I resented him for moving to Texas.
I am going to tell you though I thank God they made these choices because I would not be the person I am today if was not for my parents. I would not have the strength to live my life the way I do. Both are “tell like it is” individuals. They did not sugar coat life for either one of us. They allowed us to make mistakes. There is no way they did not know what the consequence would be if we did something. I would get myself in trouble and well they would say “sorry you made that decision that is being an adult.” When I got married they said marriage is hard and a lot of work. This is your decision and we’ve raised you. When I had my first child they said; we will help when you need it but we are not babysitters, and remember you wanted a child.
When I was 13 I made the decision to move in with my dad. I left my mom and my brother. The guilt is still there. I adore my brother and I am very proud of the man that he has become. I was not a kind child. Very angry and depressed. I was angry with my mom and my dad. I needed them both very much. The twist on this is when I moved to Texas I rebelled big time against my dad’s authority. Plus, I was a teenage girl that thought she knew everything. Silly, silly teenagers listen to your parents because you don’t know anything yet.
The greatest blessing God ever gave me is my MS. Yes, he gave me my husband and my children but my MS is the greatest gift he has ever given me. I had ignored him for so long, and had so much pain in my heart that he forced me to deal with it. While dealing with the diagnosis in therapy all the other stuff came out. I felt abandoned and unloved my mother, because she had given so much to other children that really needed it. I needed my mom too. I think about that now and I can’t imagine the emotional toll it took on my mom to do her job. I don’t know how she had anything left by the end of the day knowing what she knew parents were capable of doing to their children.
Almost 8 years ago my mother retired early and moved to Chicago to take care of my uncle. During that time my husband and I decided that we wanted a child. I knew that physically this was going to take a lot work. I was going to need help with the baby when I needed to rest. I asked my mom to move to Texas to help me. To be honest I thought she would say no. I thought she has taken care of my uncle and she wants to get back to her friends and her life. When she said yes my heart began to heal. I couldn’t believe that she had chosen me. I needed that. She gave up her life to be with me. I am so grateful for that.
God gave us both that gift. We had to forgive each other for what we had done to each other. Our relationship is really good now. I envy my sons relationship with her. They get to have that part of her that I really never had. I get to have it now, and it feels wonderful to have my mom. We don’t agree politically, but we do on how we give in most things. I got that from her. I just need her to be here with us. I want her to have this life with us, and know that we will take care of her if she needs it.
My parents are proud of their children and I think they know they did something right. It is amazing how God works in your life when you let him. When I told them I was sick I think it began to change for them. They both reacted in different ways. I was a month a way from getting married, and that was a concern for both of them. They knew this was going to be hard on me and my husband. My dad asked him flat out if he was still going to marry me. I have a good husband. My parents respect him a great deal, because not many men could handle that with such grace.
They both have only gotten mad at him once over the years. To be honest I am surprised neither one of them got involved in the situation. My parents don’t do that. I have never seen them that mad before because they felt he was not protecting my heart and I got very sick. I have also never seen them come together again as my parents protecting their daughter. They actually discussed it at an MS dinner where I was speaking.
They have always stayed out of our choices on how we are living now that we are adults. Well, I should say they give me looks when I can tell they don’t agree with something. I can count on one hand how many times they have said something to me. It is not always in my favor. They do not pretend their daughter is perfect when I have asked for advice (which is very rare). Thank God because it keeps me in check.
They are enjoying their life now with my children. They are proud of my boys’ hearts, and the mom I am to them. That is great feeling. When I talk about my parents I really need to include my step mom because she had to deal with a lot when I was living in her home. I have apologized to her for my actions. My boys adore her, and my step mom is an incredible woman, wife, and mother. She is just as protective of my brother and me as my parents are. I never realized that until the end of last of year. I am honoring my parents by being the adult that they raised to be.
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you." Exodus 20:12
Friday, November 4, 2011
The "What ifs" in Life
I am huge “what if” person. It drives my husband crazy, and it drives me crazy. I had to figure out a way to stop doing that all the time. A verse in proverbs says “trust in the lord” and this was not coming into my mind on a daily basis. This is my favorite verse in the bible, and I have failed to keep that command far too many times in my life out of fear. Some things in life we have no control over, and the stuff we know we can change we just have to try to do it. What is amazing is when I stopped doing that all the time and accepted things for what it was I stopped getting sick.
We are in the process of getting ready to sell our house and move. This was not even on the radar. We had not been praying about this, or even talking about it. We both are content with our life, and our home. For me the ultimate goal would be a home that my mom can share with us. We know she is alone and doesn’t have a huge amount of resources. My brother and I will have to decide about her long term care. We know how we can handle the situation, and my husband is ok with that. That was the biggest issue for me regarding him. I wanted him to feel comfortable with the idea of his mother in law living with him. I didn’t want him to resent me in the long run. Plus, this is his home and he is the head this home. I know think that, but he really is. Believe me I know how far I can push it.
The good thing about this is she will have separate quarters and she won’t be in the actual house with us. I love my mom, but I have not lived with her since I was 13 when I moved to Texas. It is amazing how life comes full circle. I would not be able to function physically without my mom being here. She is our “nanny.” We are very close and she is a huge support system to me. I am commanded by god to honor my parents and care for them later in life. I really have no choice about this. God knew that I worried about this and he gave me plenty of time to sort out the details on how I was to handle it. He knows I am not very good with change. He sure has been pushing me out of my comfort zones lately. The bad part is I still fear the outcome. He doesn’t want me to do that. He will drive me crazy until I get it.
I am nervous about this process. Our realtor was here yesterday to bring our contract over. I have really been nervous about putting that “for sale” sign in the yard. She asked me why we don’t just do it now. The house is ready to go. She is right, but I need at least another week. The fear of this could overwhelm me if I am not careful. The financial part is what scares me the most. I made sure the mortgage guy at USAA was recording our conversation, so he remembered and I remembered what we needed to do. I told him that I would not yell at him unless he had told me yes and then he changed his mind. We are aware of what we could do to screw up the loan process. My poor husband will have to go threw the “we don’t need that, don’t buy that” process for a while.
The stress of my husband and perfectionism could drive me crazy, so I have already set up the rules in how we will do it. He understands and knows that I am not a detail person I just want to know how much it could possibly cost. If the a/c is bad obviously we have to think about that in Texas. He will tell me. The funny part about this is the only stuff I care about it is how big the oven is and the yard. I have got to have a big yard. I have been spoiled by our yard. The boys need it and the dogs need it.
I don’t just do the “what if’s” with the big stuff. I do it about everything. I think if I don’t attend something, or am not able to do something for someone other than my family I feel guilt. I do this with friendships all the time. I have caught myself lately doing it with my involvement in our new church. I think what if I don’t do this, or show up for this will they think I am bad “Christian.” I had to stop that, because that is view not his. I know what God requires of me. He is slowly pushing me into the process of what I can give and do at the church. He needs me to handle some other stuff first, take care of my family and my best friends.
I am no longer that person of doing more than I can. I made that promise to myself, my husband and my kids at the beginning of the year. I am giving myself a break. He made sure to give me situations that were going to force me to rid the stuff I did not need to do my life and show me what I did need to do. It is working out for me. My blessings this year have far outweighed any of the bad. I handle things differently than I did 11 months ago. Christian guilt is a hard thing. I finally said something to my husband about buying a new house. I asked him; do you think we will be able to give as much if we do this? He reminded me we would have almost the same mortgage as we do now. I felt guilty at the thought of not being able to give more financially. I would hate not being able to that. I wasn’t trusting God in this matter. God knows this so he will guide us.
I have begun to accept myself, and who I am. I look at my features and no longer think I am not a pretty woman. I look at my heart and how much it has grown. I think about the gifts he has given me that are all me. Last week I had a dream that my husband told me he wasn’t attracted to me any longer because I look like a mom that has two crazy kids that are a lot of work. God bless my boys because they have such good hearts. It is a great comfort to us that they are being raised to show great love and compassion towards others. We don’t worry too much about our appearance just about what is on the inside.
I was staring at my husband with glaring eyes the next morning, and he asked what was wrong. I am sure he was thinking do I really want to ask her that question, because I might get the wrath of a wife. I told him about the dream and what he told me erased all of that fear. It was a "what if" dream. That’s all it was. He knows he has got to tell me more that I am still a beautiful woman. Sometimes we have to tell each other what we need to hear. My husband is a pretty laid back, quiet guy and I have to remind him that I need that. Society is so harsh on what women look like. It is funny when I put on make-up, or a little more than I would normally wear because he stares at me. I asked why and he says you look pretty, or he tells me you have too much on and you don’t need that. It is good feeling knowing that he thinks that and it doesn't about the what if, if I don’t look like those other women.
There are good what ifs in life, because we have to think about the consequence of them long term. The bad what ifs have to get out of our heads because all that is, is fear of the unknown. We know the difference between right and wrong. We know what is good for us and what is bad. Sometimes we have to take a leap faith and do one thing that scares us a day. We might just overcome some of that fear.
"Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck;write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man.Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." Proverbs 3:3-6
We are in the process of getting ready to sell our house and move. This was not even on the radar. We had not been praying about this, or even talking about it. We both are content with our life, and our home. For me the ultimate goal would be a home that my mom can share with us. We know she is alone and doesn’t have a huge amount of resources. My brother and I will have to decide about her long term care. We know how we can handle the situation, and my husband is ok with that. That was the biggest issue for me regarding him. I wanted him to feel comfortable with the idea of his mother in law living with him. I didn’t want him to resent me in the long run. Plus, this is his home and he is the head this home. I know think that, but he really is. Believe me I know how far I can push it.
The good thing about this is she will have separate quarters and she won’t be in the actual house with us. I love my mom, but I have not lived with her since I was 13 when I moved to Texas. It is amazing how life comes full circle. I would not be able to function physically without my mom being here. She is our “nanny.” We are very close and she is a huge support system to me. I am commanded by god to honor my parents and care for them later in life. I really have no choice about this. God knew that I worried about this and he gave me plenty of time to sort out the details on how I was to handle it. He knows I am not very good with change. He sure has been pushing me out of my comfort zones lately. The bad part is I still fear the outcome. He doesn’t want me to do that. He will drive me crazy until I get it.
I am nervous about this process. Our realtor was here yesterday to bring our contract over. I have really been nervous about putting that “for sale” sign in the yard. She asked me why we don’t just do it now. The house is ready to go. She is right, but I need at least another week. The fear of this could overwhelm me if I am not careful. The financial part is what scares me the most. I made sure the mortgage guy at USAA was recording our conversation, so he remembered and I remembered what we needed to do. I told him that I would not yell at him unless he had told me yes and then he changed his mind. We are aware of what we could do to screw up the loan process. My poor husband will have to go threw the “we don’t need that, don’t buy that” process for a while.
The stress of my husband and perfectionism could drive me crazy, so I have already set up the rules in how we will do it. He understands and knows that I am not a detail person I just want to know how much it could possibly cost. If the a/c is bad obviously we have to think about that in Texas. He will tell me. The funny part about this is the only stuff I care about it is how big the oven is and the yard. I have got to have a big yard. I have been spoiled by our yard. The boys need it and the dogs need it.
I don’t just do the “what if’s” with the big stuff. I do it about everything. I think if I don’t attend something, or am not able to do something for someone other than my family I feel guilt. I do this with friendships all the time. I have caught myself lately doing it with my involvement in our new church. I think what if I don’t do this, or show up for this will they think I am bad “Christian.” I had to stop that, because that is view not his. I know what God requires of me. He is slowly pushing me into the process of what I can give and do at the church. He needs me to handle some other stuff first, take care of my family and my best friends.
I am no longer that person of doing more than I can. I made that promise to myself, my husband and my kids at the beginning of the year. I am giving myself a break. He made sure to give me situations that were going to force me to rid the stuff I did not need to do my life and show me what I did need to do. It is working out for me. My blessings this year have far outweighed any of the bad. I handle things differently than I did 11 months ago. Christian guilt is a hard thing. I finally said something to my husband about buying a new house. I asked him; do you think we will be able to give as much if we do this? He reminded me we would have almost the same mortgage as we do now. I felt guilty at the thought of not being able to give more financially. I would hate not being able to that. I wasn’t trusting God in this matter. God knows this so he will guide us.
I have begun to accept myself, and who I am. I look at my features and no longer think I am not a pretty woman. I look at my heart and how much it has grown. I think about the gifts he has given me that are all me. Last week I had a dream that my husband told me he wasn’t attracted to me any longer because I look like a mom that has two crazy kids that are a lot of work. God bless my boys because they have such good hearts. It is a great comfort to us that they are being raised to show great love and compassion towards others. We don’t worry too much about our appearance just about what is on the inside.
I was staring at my husband with glaring eyes the next morning, and he asked what was wrong. I am sure he was thinking do I really want to ask her that question, because I might get the wrath of a wife. I told him about the dream and what he told me erased all of that fear. It was a "what if" dream. That’s all it was. He knows he has got to tell me more that I am still a beautiful woman. Sometimes we have to tell each other what we need to hear. My husband is a pretty laid back, quiet guy and I have to remind him that I need that. Society is so harsh on what women look like. It is funny when I put on make-up, or a little more than I would normally wear because he stares at me. I asked why and he says you look pretty, or he tells me you have too much on and you don’t need that. It is good feeling knowing that he thinks that and it doesn't about the what if, if I don’t look like those other women.
There are good what ifs in life, because we have to think about the consequence of them long term. The bad what ifs have to get out of our heads because all that is, is fear of the unknown. We know the difference between right and wrong. We know what is good for us and what is bad. Sometimes we have to take a leap faith and do one thing that scares us a day. We might just overcome some of that fear.
"Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck;write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man.Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." Proverbs 3:3-6
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Foundation Cracks
If you live in Texas you understand the term foundation problems. If you live in Houston you really understand it. We are at sea level so we don’t have basements, but a big slab of concrete. It shifts all the time. We have to water our foundations in times of extreme drought, or it cracks. We can see them all over homes. When you look to buy a home or sell your home that is one of the biggest selling points; no foundation problems, or if the foundation has been repaired.
When we remodeled this past year we repaired some older cracks that needed to be fixed. Those cracks are back and now we have new ones that we will have to be fixed. Cracks in our foundations are a sign that something could be wrong. We actually have individuals that can search for them, find them and fix them. God sees the cracks in our hearts and souls. He sees what needs be fixed, but when we ignore them over time they just become bigger cracks. Just patching them doesn’t always work, because they will just show back up. The small cracks can always become a bigger problem when they are ignored.
One of the things that I love about this country is the hope we have to always achieve something better. We are always determined to find a solution to the problem; hopefully. All of these issues are just cracks in our foundation that just got out of hand. We gave too much without understanding the consequence. We sought the Garden of Eden while forgetting that men are just men and women are just women.
I think about when Christians start to lose sight of what is in their hearts, and what they are capable of. They forget that their relationship has to constantly be repaired and fed to make it grow. Self-righteousness is one hell of crack. I have been accused on more than one occasion of being a pessimist. I will analyze the good and the bad. I would be trying to change the past, or just not taking a leap of faith.
"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." James 1:2-4
Over time we can only see the sin in our hearts and lose the ability to love our own beauty. We feel attacked at every turn, or we question what another sees of our life without accepting our hearts. We worry that people will think we are selfish if we don’t give. We get angry when someone tells us no. Our hearts break when someone isn’t paying attention to what we need. Here is the thing about God, and I know that most followers of Christ don’t understand this; heal your heart before you push yourself to do more than you can. When we don’t heal our own hearts our only motive becomes what the church tells us to do, society, our families or even our friends.
I wrote a blog posting sometime back called my apologies. I regret that posting in some ways now. The reason why I say this is because I wrote it out of the persecution from others for my passion of God and politics. I wrote it because of a couple of women accused me of having too much “drama.” God made me to be a passionate woman and a loving woman. He put my heart on my sleeve. He made my heart a heart that aches when people hurt. He also gave me a heart to fight, and to stand when I see something wrong. I do get a little too passionate sometimes.
"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5
For years I have beat myself for being sick and that my husband married me. For some reason with my diagnosis I forgot that I was worthy enough for him. God put us together for a reason. We balance each other. He calms me down, and I remind him that life isn’t always so fair. A rose colored glass sometimes gets us in trouble. I remind him that he is strong enough to conquer the world if he wants to. The other reason is there aren’t too many men strong enough to take care of a wife that has a chronic illness. My husband on more than one occasion has proven that he is that man.
At the beginning of this year I had to remember that I was worthy enough for him to be married to me. I also had to remember that I was allowing my own insecurities with myself to be taken advantage of. While things weren’t done intentionally to hurt me I had allowed it to happen because I was afraid of saying anything. My husband has a beautiful heart, but he is not me. We have had to learn what is acceptable and what could be hurtful to the other.
For the first time since I was diagnosed I don’t feel guilty about telling someone no, and that I can’t do something physically; including my husband. That crack has been healed. It took ten years to heal. Guilt is our own issue; not His. If we are pushing ourselves to do something or be something we are not, all it means is that we need to fix the cracks in our own heart first. God loves us so much that he wants to heal us. He wants us to see both sides of every story, to pray for it, and heal it. We are a pretty harsh society. We have to have it one way or another. One view has to be for the masses. Too many laws and regulations stifle that.
We have a lot of cracks to fix in our lives. I don’t believe we can fix them without him. I don’t believe that we have a moral and ethical society do it. We pick and choose how we live with him in our lives. We have turned too many wrongs into rights. We fight everything with vengeance and anger. We don’t have the capability to hold ourselves accountable in this society, because we have become self-righteous, prideful, greedy, and an envious society. You may say to yourself while reading this that this isn’t me well can we really say that? I know I can’t. Take a step back, work on the cracks that we have in our hearts. Give ourselves the time to discern the bigger picture.
I have friends that say “well I want to give” and “I know I don’t need all of this.” They are struggling with what society is telling them to do. Don’t give anything right now except to your families. Don’t feel guilty for what God has blessed you with. Take a break and breathe. It takes a lot of courage and strength to face what is in our hearts. It takes such courage to be willing to say we have to fix this first before we can move forward. For some us our only goal right now is to keep our families on track and that is all he wants from us. There is nothing wrong with that, so please stop beating yourself up for it. Take care of your heart, protect it, heal it and most of all remember He does love you. If we begin to trust him a little more each day he will start working miracles.
"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me."2 Corinthians 12:9
When we remodeled this past year we repaired some older cracks that needed to be fixed. Those cracks are back and now we have new ones that we will have to be fixed. Cracks in our foundations are a sign that something could be wrong. We actually have individuals that can search for them, find them and fix them. God sees the cracks in our hearts and souls. He sees what needs be fixed, but when we ignore them over time they just become bigger cracks. Just patching them doesn’t always work, because they will just show back up. The small cracks can always become a bigger problem when they are ignored.
One of the things that I love about this country is the hope we have to always achieve something better. We are always determined to find a solution to the problem; hopefully. All of these issues are just cracks in our foundation that just got out of hand. We gave too much without understanding the consequence. We sought the Garden of Eden while forgetting that men are just men and women are just women.
I think about when Christians start to lose sight of what is in their hearts, and what they are capable of. They forget that their relationship has to constantly be repaired and fed to make it grow. Self-righteousness is one hell of crack. I have been accused on more than one occasion of being a pessimist. I will analyze the good and the bad. I would be trying to change the past, or just not taking a leap of faith.
"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing." James 1:2-4
Over time we can only see the sin in our hearts and lose the ability to love our own beauty. We feel attacked at every turn, or we question what another sees of our life without accepting our hearts. We worry that people will think we are selfish if we don’t give. We get angry when someone tells us no. Our hearts break when someone isn’t paying attention to what we need. Here is the thing about God, and I know that most followers of Christ don’t understand this; heal your heart before you push yourself to do more than you can. When we don’t heal our own hearts our only motive becomes what the church tells us to do, society, our families or even our friends.
I wrote a blog posting sometime back called my apologies. I regret that posting in some ways now. The reason why I say this is because I wrote it out of the persecution from others for my passion of God and politics. I wrote it because of a couple of women accused me of having too much “drama.” God made me to be a passionate woman and a loving woman. He put my heart on my sleeve. He made my heart a heart that aches when people hurt. He also gave me a heart to fight, and to stand when I see something wrong. I do get a little too passionate sometimes.
"More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5
For years I have beat myself for being sick and that my husband married me. For some reason with my diagnosis I forgot that I was worthy enough for him. God put us together for a reason. We balance each other. He calms me down, and I remind him that life isn’t always so fair. A rose colored glass sometimes gets us in trouble. I remind him that he is strong enough to conquer the world if he wants to. The other reason is there aren’t too many men strong enough to take care of a wife that has a chronic illness. My husband on more than one occasion has proven that he is that man.
At the beginning of this year I had to remember that I was worthy enough for him to be married to me. I also had to remember that I was allowing my own insecurities with myself to be taken advantage of. While things weren’t done intentionally to hurt me I had allowed it to happen because I was afraid of saying anything. My husband has a beautiful heart, but he is not me. We have had to learn what is acceptable and what could be hurtful to the other.
For the first time since I was diagnosed I don’t feel guilty about telling someone no, and that I can’t do something physically; including my husband. That crack has been healed. It took ten years to heal. Guilt is our own issue; not His. If we are pushing ourselves to do something or be something we are not, all it means is that we need to fix the cracks in our own heart first. God loves us so much that he wants to heal us. He wants us to see both sides of every story, to pray for it, and heal it. We are a pretty harsh society. We have to have it one way or another. One view has to be for the masses. Too many laws and regulations stifle that.
We have a lot of cracks to fix in our lives. I don’t believe we can fix them without him. I don’t believe that we have a moral and ethical society do it. We pick and choose how we live with him in our lives. We have turned too many wrongs into rights. We fight everything with vengeance and anger. We don’t have the capability to hold ourselves accountable in this society, because we have become self-righteous, prideful, greedy, and an envious society. You may say to yourself while reading this that this isn’t me well can we really say that? I know I can’t. Take a step back, work on the cracks that we have in our hearts. Give ourselves the time to discern the bigger picture.
I have friends that say “well I want to give” and “I know I don’t need all of this.” They are struggling with what society is telling them to do. Don’t give anything right now except to your families. Don’t feel guilty for what God has blessed you with. Take a break and breathe. It takes a lot of courage and strength to face what is in our hearts. It takes such courage to be willing to say we have to fix this first before we can move forward. For some us our only goal right now is to keep our families on track and that is all he wants from us. There is nothing wrong with that, so please stop beating yourself up for it. Take care of your heart, protect it, heal it and most of all remember He does love you. If we begin to trust him a little more each day he will start working miracles.
"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me."2 Corinthians 12:9
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
We have to work for it. Not just money.
I get up in the middle night every day. At first I thought it had to do with my meds for my MS, but there at times where I have felt an urgency from him to pay attention. It does get old, but this is my time with Him. I have accepted this about my relationship with him. This is when I focus on him the most, and he knows that. The last couple of weeks I have been praying about some things that have become my idols. I should say distractions that are really interfering in my life.
I spend hours in solitude with him. I have made this sacrifice to him that I will do it, and he is holding me accountable to it. At the beginning I had no idea that this is what he was doing. I must say that God is very good at nagging you about stuff. He gives me sleep when I need it. He gives me the strength to make it through the day. He is not done with me on so many levels and when I ignore him out of fear I get myself in trouble. It is hard facing the issues we have in our hearts, or reality. It is beautiful thing when we finally see what he has been trying to show us.
My question is why are we aren’t we happy with our lives? Why are we looking at others to fulfill that void? What is in us that we think life should be easy and we don’t have to work for it. I’m not talking about money. Every fulfillment we have in our lives is because we worked for it. I have peace about certain things because I worked for it not because someone did it for me. Sometimes I wish we would just say no, or I can’t do that right now. I really do, because then we would be telling the truth. We can’t accept no from anyone, or we make them feel guilty for not doing it. I think we do that because we have our own guilt for the stuff we ignore, or for what we don’t do. Our bible study teacher said something Sunday that really struck a chord with me. “Compassion sometimes is doing something that we don’t want to do.” Sometimes telling someone no is the best thing we can do for someone, or actually being there to listen when someone needs us. I see the word “no” as forcing someone to do it on their own.
It would be refreshing if our government finally said we aren’t going to do it anymore. We can’t afford it. We have to fix it. We have to get rid of the stuff that citizens should be paying for on their own. We will protect you from the evils of the world. Help our seniors if they need it, and most of all our children. We will give individuals 6 or 7 months to get their lives back on track, but that is it. What we are seeing though is we want our debts erased. We don’t want to be really responsible for ourselves and our financial responsibilities. We may say it, but are actions go against our words. I understand that we are scared. I have to question individuals though on how this is fair to another that did the right thing, and is still doing it. This should have nothing to do with how wealthy someone is if we have God in our hearts.
Monday I went to the doctor, and when I got out I had to get some prescriptions filled. I picked up my re-fills as well. My co-pays have gone up again. I’ve accepted the fact that with the health care bill they are going up. I can afford my insurance. My husband’s portion is paid for by his company as a benefit to him; part of his salary but this probably won't happen much longer. We have to cover our family though.. A gentleman was there also. A senior in his 80’s. His co-pays have gone up also. One of his meds was deemed too expensive by Medicare. I could see the fear and concern in his eyes.
We talked about it. He said I have worked all my life. I have good private insurance and I can afford to pay for my medicine right now out of my pocket that the insurance will no longer cover. He said “I don’t know about my friends that can’t and are relying on Medicare to cover it.” The bill is affecting us, will affect us and we have to brace our selves for that. So many wanted affordable healthcare, but the problem is it doesn’t affect just a few it affects all of us and it costs a lot of money to do that. I can pay for my insurance and my extra co-pays. That is not always going to be the case because my family has to cover socialized medicine now. This is the truth, and all you have to do is look at European countries that have been doing this for years.
Did anyone think about how this would affect those that are ill, have chronic illenesses, or our seniors? No they didn’t. I was angry in the beginning about all of this, because I understood what it meant. My care will be deemed too expensive in a lot of cases because we have to cover the masses. I don’t blame my insurance company, or my drug company. I blame the United States government and all those citizens that supported this. We are one hell of a selfish country.
I am not wealthy, and to be honest I do not feel bad for our government workers that have to pay more now. This is the private sector, and government jobs are paid by individuals like my husband. I really don’t feel bad that union workers are losing their collective bargaining rights. The more that the employees ask for that work for the government we have to pay for in the private sector. Please stop, and tell them to fix the problems. They are killing us financially. Yes, government employees pay taxes but if corporations and businesses get taxed more, get slammed with higher healthcare costs or regulations you are biting the very hand that feeds you.
I pray that our president does not win again. I pray that a man gets in there and runs the country like a business. I pray that he has enough courage to tell the American people that it is time for us take accountability for our lives. I pray that people understand that the more we ask of them we will fall economically and they have control over our lives. Where will we be then? Military will be weak. Police and fire departments will be cut more. Education will be worse than it is now. Most of all our children will suffer more in the future. I don’t know if I could live with that guilt and regret in my heart.
"Moreover, I saw under the sun that in the place of justice, even there was wickedness, and in the place of righteousness, even there was wickedness. I said in my heart, God will judge the righteous and the wicked, for there is a time for every matter and for every work. I said in my heart with regard to the children of man that God is testing them that they may see that they themselves are but beasts. For what happens to the children of man and what happens to the beasts is the same; as one dies, so dies the other. They all have the same breath, and man has no advantage over the beasts, for all is vanity. All go to one place. All are from the dust, and to dust all return. Who knows whether the spirit of man goes upward and the spirit of the beast goes down into the earth? So I saw that there is nothing better than that a man should rejoice in his work, for that is his lot. Who can bring him to see what will be after him? (Ecclesiastes 3:16-22 ESV)"
I spend hours in solitude with him. I have made this sacrifice to him that I will do it, and he is holding me accountable to it. At the beginning I had no idea that this is what he was doing. I must say that God is very good at nagging you about stuff. He gives me sleep when I need it. He gives me the strength to make it through the day. He is not done with me on so many levels and when I ignore him out of fear I get myself in trouble. It is hard facing the issues we have in our hearts, or reality. It is beautiful thing when we finally see what he has been trying to show us.
My question is why are we aren’t we happy with our lives? Why are we looking at others to fulfill that void? What is in us that we think life should be easy and we don’t have to work for it. I’m not talking about money. Every fulfillment we have in our lives is because we worked for it. I have peace about certain things because I worked for it not because someone did it for me. Sometimes I wish we would just say no, or I can’t do that right now. I really do, because then we would be telling the truth. We can’t accept no from anyone, or we make them feel guilty for not doing it. I think we do that because we have our own guilt for the stuff we ignore, or for what we don’t do. Our bible study teacher said something Sunday that really struck a chord with me. “Compassion sometimes is doing something that we don’t want to do.” Sometimes telling someone no is the best thing we can do for someone, or actually being there to listen when someone needs us. I see the word “no” as forcing someone to do it on their own.
It would be refreshing if our government finally said we aren’t going to do it anymore. We can’t afford it. We have to fix it. We have to get rid of the stuff that citizens should be paying for on their own. We will protect you from the evils of the world. Help our seniors if they need it, and most of all our children. We will give individuals 6 or 7 months to get their lives back on track, but that is it. What we are seeing though is we want our debts erased. We don’t want to be really responsible for ourselves and our financial responsibilities. We may say it, but are actions go against our words. I understand that we are scared. I have to question individuals though on how this is fair to another that did the right thing, and is still doing it. This should have nothing to do with how wealthy someone is if we have God in our hearts.
Monday I went to the doctor, and when I got out I had to get some prescriptions filled. I picked up my re-fills as well. My co-pays have gone up again. I’ve accepted the fact that with the health care bill they are going up. I can afford my insurance. My husband’s portion is paid for by his company as a benefit to him; part of his salary but this probably won't happen much longer. We have to cover our family though.. A gentleman was there also. A senior in his 80’s. His co-pays have gone up also. One of his meds was deemed too expensive by Medicare. I could see the fear and concern in his eyes.
We talked about it. He said I have worked all my life. I have good private insurance and I can afford to pay for my medicine right now out of my pocket that the insurance will no longer cover. He said “I don’t know about my friends that can’t and are relying on Medicare to cover it.” The bill is affecting us, will affect us and we have to brace our selves for that. So many wanted affordable healthcare, but the problem is it doesn’t affect just a few it affects all of us and it costs a lot of money to do that. I can pay for my insurance and my extra co-pays. That is not always going to be the case because my family has to cover socialized medicine now. This is the truth, and all you have to do is look at European countries that have been doing this for years.
Did anyone think about how this would affect those that are ill, have chronic illenesses, or our seniors? No they didn’t. I was angry in the beginning about all of this, because I understood what it meant. My care will be deemed too expensive in a lot of cases because we have to cover the masses. I don’t blame my insurance company, or my drug company. I blame the United States government and all those citizens that supported this. We are one hell of a selfish country.
I am not wealthy, and to be honest I do not feel bad for our government workers that have to pay more now. This is the private sector, and government jobs are paid by individuals like my husband. I really don’t feel bad that union workers are losing their collective bargaining rights. The more that the employees ask for that work for the government we have to pay for in the private sector. Please stop, and tell them to fix the problems. They are killing us financially. Yes, government employees pay taxes but if corporations and businesses get taxed more, get slammed with higher healthcare costs or regulations you are biting the very hand that feeds you.
I pray that our president does not win again. I pray that a man gets in there and runs the country like a business. I pray that he has enough courage to tell the American people that it is time for us take accountability for our lives. I pray that people understand that the more we ask of them we will fall economically and they have control over our lives. Where will we be then? Military will be weak. Police and fire departments will be cut more. Education will be worse than it is now. Most of all our children will suffer more in the future. I don’t know if I could live with that guilt and regret in my heart.
"Moreover, I saw under the sun that in the place of justice, even there was wickedness, and in the place of righteousness, even there was wickedness. I said in my heart, God will judge the righteous and the wicked, for there is a time for every matter and for every work. I said in my heart with regard to the children of man that God is testing them that they may see that they themselves are but beasts. For what happens to the children of man and what happens to the beasts is the same; as one dies, so dies the other. They all have the same breath, and man has no advantage over the beasts, for all is vanity. All go to one place. All are from the dust, and to dust all return. Who knows whether the spirit of man goes upward and the spirit of the beast goes down into the earth? So I saw that there is nothing better than that a man should rejoice in his work, for that is his lot. Who can bring him to see what will be after him? (Ecclesiastes 3:16-22 ESV)"
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
I hope this offends you
I just scanned two articles regarding the Occupy Wall Street protests. One was that a 6 year old girl was living in a tent with heroin addicts/dealers. The other was about a 14 year old girl that possibly could have been raped, and the police are now investigating. Can we explain how this is the same as the tea party movement in this country? Is it because practicing their right of free speech? I don’t think I have one article about a child being raped and another living with heroin addicts in a tent at tea party movement.
Disgusting and vile are the only words that I can describe the abuse of a child. The protestors want Wall Street to be held accountable for its practices. I get it. I get that individuals believe that this is the reason why they don’t have jobs or money. The government and financial institutions work together. The government regulates and Wall Street has to make up the revenue loss. Do you see Wall Street executives out on the streets raping girls? Do you see them living in a tent with a 6 year old girl handing out heroin? How the hell is this accountability? Where is the accountability of our President that supports this movement as well as so many in his party?
A couple of weeks they opened the memorial for Martin Luther King Jr. on the Washington Mall. President Obama said that he would have supported the protests. Reverend King did support violence Mr. President and never would have supported violence or neglect of a child. Nancy Pelosi and her crew think that it is wonderful that these Americans are standing up for their rights. I really hope that I never meet her.
I have to admit that I have reached a whole new level of shame and anger regarding this country this morning. I have started to question even more why anyone would support our president and really be a democrat. If you can explain the ideology about the unfairness of not having money, but yet be abused continually by your own government please explain. If you can explain why you have a right to anything other than food, shelter, and clothing please tell me? We are to protect innocent life in this country, but would rather spread the wealth around. Why is that so important to so many when children are being hurt? Where is the justice in that?
We are fighting about higher taxes, affordable healthcare, welfare, job bills, defense cuts, immigration, gay marriage, college tuition, etc but yet our children are being hurt the most. We give more protection to evil in this country because of circumstance now and it is quite frankly unacceptable. We are supposed to have compassion for the drug addict that neglects a child. We are supposed to have compassion for a rapist because of his or her childhood. We have to be supportive of Muslims, but yet they marry 8 year old girls, rape their wives because they think are entitled to, or my favorite on is stone a woman in an arena because she looked at another man.
Most recently I read article that pedophiles would like the same rights as homosexuals, because theirs’ is a lifestyle. The intellectual elite are saying that we have to understand this is acceptable behavior, and they should receive the same rights as consenting adults in their sexual relationships. This is natural for them, and we should understand this is the same as our own sexual desires. My mother was a social worker for sexually abused children, and we should give pedophiles the death penalty in this country. There is no justice strong enough for someone that hurts an innocent life. I can’t write anymore about this.
We can fight all we want about these other issues, but aren’t we supposed to protect children. I will ask my friends that are on the left is this ok with you, and does it really matter if you have affordable healthcare? Does it really matter to us so much that we don’t make a million dollars, and we think that is unfair?
I hope this posting offended some of us, because if we support the left side in this country then this is what we are allowing all because of money. We wanted defense cuts in this country all because of “social services.” We wanted to show compassion for evil. I hope that I lose friends in my life over this posting today, because you know what it is going to show me that this is exactly what is in your heart, and what you are willing to give up because your money. Don’t give the excuse of a few bad eggs, because guess what you are supporting a president that believes in collective salvation and all the masses are his to save.
But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people”( 2 Timothy 3:1-5 ESV)
But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs. (1 Timothy 6:9-10 ESV)
Disgusting and vile are the only words that I can describe the abuse of a child. The protestors want Wall Street to be held accountable for its practices. I get it. I get that individuals believe that this is the reason why they don’t have jobs or money. The government and financial institutions work together. The government regulates and Wall Street has to make up the revenue loss. Do you see Wall Street executives out on the streets raping girls? Do you see them living in a tent with a 6 year old girl handing out heroin? How the hell is this accountability? Where is the accountability of our President that supports this movement as well as so many in his party?
A couple of weeks they opened the memorial for Martin Luther King Jr. on the Washington Mall. President Obama said that he would have supported the protests. Reverend King did support violence Mr. President and never would have supported violence or neglect of a child. Nancy Pelosi and her crew think that it is wonderful that these Americans are standing up for their rights. I really hope that I never meet her.
I have to admit that I have reached a whole new level of shame and anger regarding this country this morning. I have started to question even more why anyone would support our president and really be a democrat. If you can explain the ideology about the unfairness of not having money, but yet be abused continually by your own government please explain. If you can explain why you have a right to anything other than food, shelter, and clothing please tell me? We are to protect innocent life in this country, but would rather spread the wealth around. Why is that so important to so many when children are being hurt? Where is the justice in that?
We are fighting about higher taxes, affordable healthcare, welfare, job bills, defense cuts, immigration, gay marriage, college tuition, etc but yet our children are being hurt the most. We give more protection to evil in this country because of circumstance now and it is quite frankly unacceptable. We are supposed to have compassion for the drug addict that neglects a child. We are supposed to have compassion for a rapist because of his or her childhood. We have to be supportive of Muslims, but yet they marry 8 year old girls, rape their wives because they think are entitled to, or my favorite on is stone a woman in an arena because she looked at another man.
Most recently I read article that pedophiles would like the same rights as homosexuals, because theirs’ is a lifestyle. The intellectual elite are saying that we have to understand this is acceptable behavior, and they should receive the same rights as consenting adults in their sexual relationships. This is natural for them, and we should understand this is the same as our own sexual desires. My mother was a social worker for sexually abused children, and we should give pedophiles the death penalty in this country. There is no justice strong enough for someone that hurts an innocent life. I can’t write anymore about this.
We can fight all we want about these other issues, but aren’t we supposed to protect children. I will ask my friends that are on the left is this ok with you, and does it really matter if you have affordable healthcare? Does it really matter to us so much that we don’t make a million dollars, and we think that is unfair?
I hope this posting offended some of us, because if we support the left side in this country then this is what we are allowing all because of money. We wanted defense cuts in this country all because of “social services.” We wanted to show compassion for evil. I hope that I lose friends in my life over this posting today, because you know what it is going to show me that this is exactly what is in your heart, and what you are willing to give up because your money. Don’t give the excuse of a few bad eggs, because guess what you are supporting a president that believes in collective salvation and all the masses are his to save.
But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people”( 2 Timothy 3:1-5 ESV)
But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs. (1 Timothy 6:9-10 ESV)
Monday, October 24, 2011
Do we think we are wise?
“Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.” (James 3:13-18 ESV)
The book of James is one of my favorite books. Yesterday our bible study teacher said “how do you know if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart?” The answer; can you rejoice in another’s accomplishments and life? Can you be happy for another? Can you look at their lives and feel grace towards them, or do you look at their life and wish you had all they had? Pretty simple definition.
This isn’t just about material things though. This is also about relationships, or feelings of dissatisfaction with our lives. It is feelings of anger, vanity, anxiety, worry, selfishness, greed, envy or guilt. We can not take material wealth with us. It makes life easier, and we are very accustomed to having things easy is this country. Are we able to rejoice at our blessings, or do we search for more? For most us the answer would be we search for more. We are not wise enough yet in life to see what is good, because we only see what we don’t have.
We love to complain in this country; including me. It has been stressful in this house lately, because of a project my husband has been working on. He’s gone a lot and it is bothering the boys and me. I thought about this yesterday. I should be rejoicing that he has a job to go to and that he comes home every night. I’ve got to keep it in check. I am being selfish when I get upset about it. This is marriage. We are always thinking about what our spouse isn’t doing instead of what they are doing. Constant work in progress.
Seeking wisdom and discernment from Christ is a prayer I think we all need right now. I think people have forgotten that they should seek wisdom from others if they can’t figure something out. Being afraid to ask someone is pride. Why do we that? I think we fear judgment more than anything. We are afraid that someone will look down on us. Why can’t we ask someone the tough questions we need to in this country? Why can’t we ask our friends, or family on how to handle a situation?
I had a discussion about abortion on Friday. I don’t believe in it, but I do know that we have to work within our laws if we are going to educate women about why this is a child and not a mass of cells. The disturbing part about abortion in this country is that the women that choose to have one are highly educated, white women. I have noticed that women that don’t believe in God, or have a strong relationship with Christ consider this alright because of circumstance. I was that way in the beginning of this journey. This is not meant to be offensive to some, but life is created at conception and there is a purpose for all life.
Women don’t want to be judged, or attacked because they make this decision. Most pro-life individuals don’t understand that this judgment is not ours to make. They will be held accountable by God. We get a little too radical in our thinking that we no longer have empathy, or compassion for another. We know that it is life. We made it a wrong into a right in this country. My question is have we ever looked a woman in the eye when she is terrified about having a child? Have we ever actually told her that there are people out their that will help them get through this.
Our self-righteousness and pride blinds us. We are so angry about everything that we can’t even reason with each other without love and respect any longer. I don’t care how far along we are in our journey God is going to question whether or not we have enough love and compassion in our hearts to see that an individual is hurting. I am so sick of seeing arguing and nothing getting resolved in this country. I am at a loss as to why so many of us have lost common sense and reason. I almost think we are too educated.
When we seek wisdom from friends I am going to put a little warning out. Seek it from friends that you know are strong in their relationship with Christ. I had to learn this a few months ago and the end result was extremely hurtful. The women that I seek advice and wisdom from are going to tell me the truth, because they love me. I have learned not to seek advice regarding my heart from women that are not Christians. The reason why I say this is because we are a very self-centered society and people feed our egos without giving us the bigger picture, or just flat out the truth. An example would be our marriages. Women talk about their husbands and husbands talk about their wives. If they don’t have Christ in their life they are going to tell us exactly what we want to hear, and not that we were wrong.
The below story is still my favorite in the bible. Whoever can cast the first stone go right on ahead and do it. Good luck with that. We have no right to judge another, only God has that right. We are going to have to accept what is going on in this country because God is allowing it to happen. I am not saying that we have to be silent, but sooner or later we have to accept the consequence of our actions and find a way to solve the problems we have.
“but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them. The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.” (John 8:1-11 ESV)
The book of James is one of my favorite books. Yesterday our bible study teacher said “how do you know if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart?” The answer; can you rejoice in another’s accomplishments and life? Can you be happy for another? Can you look at their lives and feel grace towards them, or do you look at their life and wish you had all they had? Pretty simple definition.
This isn’t just about material things though. This is also about relationships, or feelings of dissatisfaction with our lives. It is feelings of anger, vanity, anxiety, worry, selfishness, greed, envy or guilt. We can not take material wealth with us. It makes life easier, and we are very accustomed to having things easy is this country. Are we able to rejoice at our blessings, or do we search for more? For most us the answer would be we search for more. We are not wise enough yet in life to see what is good, because we only see what we don’t have.
We love to complain in this country; including me. It has been stressful in this house lately, because of a project my husband has been working on. He’s gone a lot and it is bothering the boys and me. I thought about this yesterday. I should be rejoicing that he has a job to go to and that he comes home every night. I’ve got to keep it in check. I am being selfish when I get upset about it. This is marriage. We are always thinking about what our spouse isn’t doing instead of what they are doing. Constant work in progress.
Seeking wisdom and discernment from Christ is a prayer I think we all need right now. I think people have forgotten that they should seek wisdom from others if they can’t figure something out. Being afraid to ask someone is pride. Why do we that? I think we fear judgment more than anything. We are afraid that someone will look down on us. Why can’t we ask someone the tough questions we need to in this country? Why can’t we ask our friends, or family on how to handle a situation?
I had a discussion about abortion on Friday. I don’t believe in it, but I do know that we have to work within our laws if we are going to educate women about why this is a child and not a mass of cells. The disturbing part about abortion in this country is that the women that choose to have one are highly educated, white women. I have noticed that women that don’t believe in God, or have a strong relationship with Christ consider this alright because of circumstance. I was that way in the beginning of this journey. This is not meant to be offensive to some, but life is created at conception and there is a purpose for all life.
Women don’t want to be judged, or attacked because they make this decision. Most pro-life individuals don’t understand that this judgment is not ours to make. They will be held accountable by God. We get a little too radical in our thinking that we no longer have empathy, or compassion for another. We know that it is life. We made it a wrong into a right in this country. My question is have we ever looked a woman in the eye when she is terrified about having a child? Have we ever actually told her that there are people out their that will help them get through this.
Our self-righteousness and pride blinds us. We are so angry about everything that we can’t even reason with each other without love and respect any longer. I don’t care how far along we are in our journey God is going to question whether or not we have enough love and compassion in our hearts to see that an individual is hurting. I am so sick of seeing arguing and nothing getting resolved in this country. I am at a loss as to why so many of us have lost common sense and reason. I almost think we are too educated.
When we seek wisdom from friends I am going to put a little warning out. Seek it from friends that you know are strong in their relationship with Christ. I had to learn this a few months ago and the end result was extremely hurtful. The women that I seek advice and wisdom from are going to tell me the truth, because they love me. I have learned not to seek advice regarding my heart from women that are not Christians. The reason why I say this is because we are a very self-centered society and people feed our egos without giving us the bigger picture, or just flat out the truth. An example would be our marriages. Women talk about their husbands and husbands talk about their wives. If they don’t have Christ in their life they are going to tell us exactly what we want to hear, and not that we were wrong.
The below story is still my favorite in the bible. Whoever can cast the first stone go right on ahead and do it. Good luck with that. We have no right to judge another, only God has that right. We are going to have to accept what is going on in this country because God is allowing it to happen. I am not saying that we have to be silent, but sooner or later we have to accept the consequence of our actions and find a way to solve the problems we have.
“but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them. The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.” (John 8:1-11 ESV)
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